 I mean, this had to happen eventually, right? My proposed theorem is something along these lines: whenever a douchey new trend/designer comes out, there must inevitably be douches who actually wear/buy their merchandise, thus exposing it to more douches and making it more popular. Someone must inevitably then swoop in and create a douchey/stinky perfume line, which will inevitably eventually expand into a line of douchey cosmetics, most likely with douchey (aka “zany”) packaging.
Basically, I’m a mathematical genius, Ed Hardy sucks, my coworker who wears this perfume makes me gag when it still smells “fresh”, and at least the mirror is big. Right?
I don’t know how I’m going to go on.
 Ever since I first spotted this natural-haired brush in some makeup artist’s arsenal, I’ve been searching long and hard for my own synthetic version. (I tend to prefer synthetic brush hairs like Too Faced’s Teddy Bear Hair brushes, because they just feel much softer and less prickly on my wussy skin.)
Well, it turns out this particular brush does *not exist* in synthetic hair. Everyone tells me that natural fibers simply grip the shadow pigment better, and that’s that. Well, I was miffed and determined to find the only synthetic one out there, but I have officially failed. (And I checked every single brand and cosmetics website I could find! Thankfully, my issues with animal-hair brushes are just a preference and not an allergy or a strong moral/political stance — but where do the vegans go for these? Are they simply denied a full range of brushes? What crap!)
Anyway, today I finally found an affordable-enough version by Japonesque, so I sucked it up and bought it. Guess what? These makeup artist folks weren’t kidding! This natural-haired brush does prick a bit, but boy does it grab and apply color well. Totally worth the $18 and the compromise, at least for me.
The sharp angle of the top is useful for ergonomic application, and the flat top makes it easy to apply shadow across the entire lid and into the crease. I was even able to get good coverage with my incredibly old and wussily-colored Aveda shadow, and I’m hoping it’ll help with my similarly crappy and overpriced 100% Pure eye shadow palette.
I will probably continue to hunt for a Taklon version of this shape, because a) I like to have multiples of my favorite brush shapes, and b) I really really really don’t like the feel of the natural hair. My eyelids are even more sensitive than the rest of my skin! But alas, at least I’ll look great in the meantime while I keep searching. Hopefully this will help make it easier to pull off a smoky eye look for fall without seeming like I was in a bar fight.
 Don’t get me wrong — I learned that the right brush is dang important for certain makeup jobs, especially eye-related tasks. But give me a break!
I subscribe to Nordstrom’s marketing emails, and they recently sent out a blast about all the Nordstrom beauty exclusives they had coming up in their sale. Being the beauty junkie that I am, I glanced and spotted this baby — the Smokey Eye Brush.
Now, what gal isn’t gonna be drawn by that title? I mean, smokey eyes are a) hot, and b) difficult to pull off. (Creating them, I mean — pulling them off looks-wise is just a matter of confidence and perhaps candlelight. And, uh, context.)
I’ve always struggled with smokier shades, because the super-dark, super-pigmented shadows I use like Cargo Qatar are tricky since they show every mistake. So I thought Trish here might be helping me out, and I sucked it up and paid the steep $52 for just one brush — after all, I needed to qualify for free shipping with another purchase.
Well guess what, ladies? This brush is BULL. It a) doesn’t fit the size of my eye (too short), b) doesn’t fit the shape of my eye (too symmetrical), and c) doesn’t feel all that great or retain powder properly in order to help achieve that elusively easy smokey look the ad copy boasts.
Thank goodness Nordstrom has a great return policy.
 Ages ago, I blogged about my recent purchase of Sephora’s The Lash Stash sampler. I systematically tried every single tube, as well as purchasing or redeeming every single other sample-size tube I saw from them, including BadGal, Diorshow, and a Fresh mini duo. And I finally came up with some conclusions!
Sadly, I did not care for most of the mascaras included in their kit. My favorites from the sampler pack were Urban Decay’s Big Fattie, and Too Faced’s Lash Injection Pinpoint. However, I also fell for the non-sampler minis of Diorshow, the teal Fresh Firebird, and lastly a Clinique surprise stunner that became my new Holy Grail of mascaras. My hairdresser even complimented me on how great it looked the other day, and that’s high praise indeed!
My reviews kinda broke down like this: I loved Diorshow for the initial application full of clump-free volume and length, but I didn’t love the eventual flaking and smudgery that inevitably occurred. I loved Too Faced’s tiny Pinpoint brush, since the bases of my lashes are blonde and hard to reach with a normal brush (unless I don’t mind striping up my lids in the process). But Too Faced a) kinda stung my sensitive eyes, and b) was a huge pain to remove, even armed with hardcore ouchy makeup remover. (I totally didn’t realize Too Faced’s formulation was a “tube” mascara, or I would’ve stayed away!)
So I went on a quest to find another mascara with an equally tiny brush, but a kinder formulation. Enter Clinique Lash Power Mascara. Similar teensy brush to Too Faced, but a better formulation that didn’t flake or smudge but was easy to get off with just warm water. It’s not quite a tube formulation (like Blinc KissMe or Imju Fiberwig, or Too Faced for that matter) but still lasts through heat and rain and sweat. So great! And apparently they also make it in a brownish shade that my redhead-ish friend Charli decided to try out — I’ll update if I hear or see how that goes.
Anyway, in case any other mascara nerds are insanely curious, I took notes every day I was trying out a different brand, so read on for those…
Continue reading The Great Mascara Review
Two pairs of Spanx. And no eating. Heh, I had you all excited for a second there; don’t deny it!
I sometimes get struck by utter genius when I’m in the shower, and last Tuesday was no exception. I’ve invented a whole new beauty term!
Brotox
\BROH-tawks\ noun
1 : A male who exhibits evidence of creepily unnecessary anti-wrinkle treatments;
2: An alternate name for Botox when used on male subjects.
This tickled me enough to add a “Beauty Neologisms” category, in case I come up with any more good ones. Watch out, Mickey Rourke — soon I’ll have a complete new lexicon to describe your freaky ass! (Please put down the bronzer.)
I think I finally found my favorite shine serum ever: Moroccanoil. So very yummy smelling, and I love that it doesn’t get greasy or heavy looking unless you really put gobs on. Too bad the smell doesn’t last longer!
 I must have gotten possessed the other day, because I somehow managed to make a fairly large LUSH purchase online. And I stopped buying their stuff years ago — too much SLS, dyes, fragrances, etc. for my sensitive skin. But they do definitely have some winners — I always wind up going back to Aromacreme, and Big is scratch-tastic and Flying Fox smells like heaven.
Well, I discovered a couple new hits this last time around. Vanillary smells similar to my usual Comptoir Sud Pacifique Vanille Coco fragrance, but slightly less sweet; and the apparently best-selling Jungle solid conditioner bar is less of a pain in the ass than I would have predicted. But the real show-stealer was a new cleanser meant for problem skin, called Dark Angels.
Continue reading Dark Angels, indeed!
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